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The Surrender Experiment by Michael Singer

The Surrender Experiment by Michael Singer

by Parker · 173 things on Twos

My Journey Into Life's Perfection
Section 1: Waking Up
The Premise
I just kept letting go and practicing nonresistance, whether I liked what was happening or not.
Life rarely unfolds exactly as we want it to.
What manifests in front of us at any given moment is actually something truly extraordinary—it is the end result of all the forces that have been interacting together for billions of years.
We are not responsible for even the tiniest fraction of what is manifesting around us. Nonetheless, we walk around constantly trying to control and determine what will happen in our lives. No wonder there’s so much tension, anxiety, and fear.
Every day, we give precedence to our mind’s thoughts over the reality unfolding before us. We regularly say things like, “It better not rain today because I’m going camping” or “I better get that raise because I really need the money.” Notice that these bold claims about what should and shouldn’t be happening are not based on scientific evidence; they’re based solely on personal preferences made up in our minds.
We have been gifted with the power of will. From deep inside, we can determine how we want something to be and apply the power of our minds, hearts, and bodies in an attempt to make the outside world conform. But this puts us in a constant battle of our way versus the way it would be without our intervention. This battle between individual will and the reality of life unfolding around us ends up consuming our lives. When we win the battle, we are happy and relaxed; when we don’t, we are disturbed and stressed. Since most of us only feel good when things are going our way, we are constantly attempting to control everything in our lives.
If the natural unfolding of the process of life can create and take care of the entire universe, is it really reasonable for us to assume that nothing good will happen unless we force it to?
Am I better off making up an alternate reality in my mind and then fighting with reality to make it be my way, or am I better off letting go of what I want and serving the same forces of reality that managed to create the entire perfection of the universe around me?
Aligning one’s will with the natural forces unfolding around us leads to some surprisingly powerful results.
Chapter 1. Not with a Shout—But with a Whisper
Instead of simply being uncomfortable and trying to find something to say, I noticed that I was uncomfortable and trying to find something to say. For the first time in my life, my mind and emotions were something I was watching instead of being.
It was like I was suddenly able to remain above my mind and quietly watch the thoughts being created.
I had always been in there watching, but I had been too unaware to notice. It was as though I had been so involved in their details that I never saw them as just thoughts and emotions.
Chapter 2. Getting to Know Me
It was overwhelming at times, but I never lost the perspective of watching a voice talking inside. It was obvious it wasn’t me; it was something I was watching.
Chapter 3. The Pillars of Zen
Three Pillars of Zen by Philip Kapleau
Simply sit down in a quiet spot, watch your breath go in and out, and mentally repeat the sound Mu.
Chapter 4. Absolute Silence
The Zen book instructed me to make the Mu sound way down in my belly, below the belly button. I watched my breath go in and out from way down there.
Chapter 5. From Absolute Peace to Absolute Turmoil
I eventually realized that if I didn’t want to listen to the mental chatter, all I had to do was slightly increase my concentration on the energy flow to my brow. The thoughts would then pass right by without disturbing me.
Chapter 6. South of the Border
I was gradually learning that life was not as fragile as that voice in my head would have me believe. There were experiences to be had, but only if you were willing to have them.
Life had provided those things to me; I had just followed the flow. I was beginning to see all these experiences as a gift from life.
Chapter 7. Disconnecting the Panic Button
I had let go of myself and something very special had followed. I was willing to face loneliness and fear and not grab for relief. Yet something happened on its own, without my doing it or even asking for it.
Chapter 8. Unexpected Inspiration
Everything in life has something to teach you and that it is all for your growth.
Chapter 9. The Promised Land
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Chapter 10. Building a Sacred Hut
“Every day bite off more than you can chew, and chew it.”
Chapter 11. Get Thee to a Monastery
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Chapter 12. When the Disciple Is Ready, the Master Appears
Autobiography of a Yogi by Paramahansa Yogananda
Section 2: The Great Experiment Begins
Chapter 13. The Experiment of a Lifetime
The first thing I noticed was that most of the mental activity revolved around my likes and dislikes. If my mind had a preference toward or against something, it actively talked about it.
I decided to just stop listening to all the chatter about my personal preferences, and instead, start the willful practice of accepting what the flow of life was presenting me.
I didn’t want to be in charge of my life; I wanted to be free to soar far beyond myself.
What would happen to me if I just inwardly surrendered my resistance and let the flow of life be in charge?
The rules of the experiment were very simple: If life brought events in front of me, I would treat them as if they came to take me beyond myself. If my personal self complained, I would use each opportunity to simply let him go and surrender to what life was presenting me.
Chapter 14. Life Takes Charge
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Chapter 15. The Prince and the Pauper
Life was asking me to get out of the way and let her do her thing. I was so glad I had been willing to take that risk.
Chapter 16. Following the Invisible into the Unknown
Surrender—what an amazingly powerful word. It often engenders the thought of weakness and cowardice. In my case, it required all the strength I had to be brave enough to follow the invisible into the unknown.
It’s not that surrender gave me clarity about where I was going—I had no idea where it would lead me. But surrender did give me clarity in one essential area: my personal preferences of like and dislike were not going to guide my life. By surrendering the hold those powerful forces had on me, I was allowing my life to be guided by a much more powerful force, life itself.
The practice of surrender was actually done in two, very distinct steps: first, you let go of the personal reactions of like and dislike that form inside your mind and heart; and second, with the resultant sense of clarity, you simply look to see what is being asked of you by the situation unfolding in front of you. What would you be doing if you weren’t being influenced by the reactions of like or dislike? Following that deeper guidance will take your life in a very different direction from where your preferences would have led you.
Chapter 17. My First Job Interview
I told her I would like to teach what I had been learning about that voice inside your head. I wanted students to understand that they don’t have to listen to that incessant chatter; they have the freedom to come from a much deeper place inside themselves. I also told her that I would like to teach students that they are sitting on a tiny planet spinning through space, and they should be enjoying the journey.
Chapter 18. Letting Go of the Rope
That scared, troubled person in there whom I had been watching and judging was indeed a person. The psyche is a person with feelings and thoughts, hopes, fears, and dreams. He is not to be locked in a room and constantly told to shut up. There are much more constructive ways to deal with these disturbed, self-centered energies.
I had built a mental concept of absolute discipline that was actually holding me back. In my meditations, I had been achieving heights by pushing down on the lower energies. But that was just a form of suppression. I had to learn to channel those energies upward instead of pushing them away from me. It took some time, but I eventually began to realize the true purpose of yoga. Done properly, yoga is the science of channeling all energies upward until they merge together at the highest point—Oneness.
Chapter 19. Acceptance, Acceptance, and More Acceptance
That was the essence of my experiment with life: if it’s down to a matter of preference—life wins.
How would I ever know what life was capable of doing if I was always in control?
The premise of the course was centered on the possibility that one underlying truth exists in the universe, and all of man’s knowledge was just looking at this truth from different perspectives.
✓ The Search for Truth (Michael Singers dissertation) (Mike's rec)
What is important from all this is that if I had listened to my own mind, none of this would have happened. By following the flow of life, instead of my own preferences, I was now a carpenter, a teacher, and a published author. Inwardly, I had grown as well. The sharp line I had drawn between spiritual and nonspiritual had begun to fade.
I was teaching those classes because an amazing flow of events had put me there. I was driving home because an amazing flow of events had put me there. Neither of these destinations was decided by me. They were the result of my letting go of myself. Little by little, the fabric of my life was composed of the results of my surrender. I was becoming surrounded by a life that had been built for me, not by me.
Chapter 20. The Most Important Thing I Was Ever Asked to Do
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Section 3: From Solitude to Service
Chapter 21. The Calling of a Living Master
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Chapter 22. Shaktipat
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Chapter 23. Gainesville Hosts a Guru
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Chapter 24. The Temple Is Built
Throughout the day I took every opportunity to quiet myself and center within. Every time I got into or out of my car, I would slow down my breath and visualize Earth spinning through outer space. Before opening a door, any door, I would remember that I was walking through a door on this tiny planet in the vast emptiness of space.
I had become pretty experienced at ignoring what “I” wanted and, instead, following the flow of life.
The amazing part was not just that the money kept showing up exactly when we needed it— it kept showing up in exactly the amounts we needed to go to the next step.
Chapter 25. Opening the Heart Chakra
Life was not asking me—it was telling me.
I had tried as hard as I could to break free of myself for years. I had resolved to find another way that did not have my mind as my spiritual adviser.
When I was building the Temple, my mind kept telling me that it was a stupid thing to do. Coming out to my place on Sundays was just a fad that would fade away. Soon I would end up with an empty building on my property. I ignored all that negative chatter and just kept building. I reflected back on those thoughts once the Temple was being used every day, morning and evening. Now, I reflect back on them even more with the gift of hindsight. Every single Sunday for over thirty-five years, seventy to eighty people have found their way out to this temple in the middle of the woods. We never advertised and don’t even have signs that show the way. Still people come, every week. Likewise, people have always shown up for my Monday and Thursday night talks, as well as for the rest of our morning and evening programs. It seems as though life knew exactly what it was doing, and as usual, my mind knew nothing.
Chapter 26. Get Thee to an Ashram
I didn’t understand that serving others is much higher than serving yourself.
I let go of myself and allowed what was meant to be—to be.
Section 4: The Business of Surrender
Chapter 27. A Company Is Born
Now I would get to see what magical rabbit hole this new act of surrender would lead me down.
Chapter 28. The Master Builder
I used my work in the world as an opportunity to let go of myself and remain calmly centered.
Chapter 29. Community Banking
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Chapter 30. The Ever-Expanding Temple of the Universe
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Chapter 31. Metamorphosis of a Creature
The walls could hold their bodies, but nothing could imprison their souls—except their own minds.
They learned to watch that voice in their head, and they learned how to not listen to all the garbage it says.
Section 5: Something Priceless Is Born
Chapter 32. From the Personal Self to the Personal Computer
I simply accepted the challenge of serving the energy that came my way.
My formula for success was very simple: Do whatever is put in front of you with all your heart and soul without regard for personal results. Do the work as though it were given to you by the universe itself—because it was.
Chapter 33. The Birth of The Medical Manager
I didn’t do a thing except serve with all my heart and soul what life brought before me.
Chapter 34. The Early Programmers
In order to keep my distance from the inner chatter, I still maintained my regular meditation schedule and continued my moment- to-moment practice of centering myself. Every time I sat down at the computer to work on the program, I took a breath and remembered that I was writing this as a gift to the universe. I was sitting on a tiny planet spinning through outer space, and this was the task that had been given to me. It never even occurred to me to ask for assistance.
We were completely focused on writing and delivering the absolutely best system we could because that was the task life had given us. The program’s destiny after the initial installations would have to unfold completely on its own—exactly as had happened every step of the way so far.
Chapter 35. Preparing for Launch
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Section 6: The Forces of Natural Growth
Chapter 36. The Foundations of a Successful Business
My experience with meditation had shown me that there were two very distinct aspects of what we call mind. There was the logical, thought- driven mind that links together what we already know into complex patterns of thought in order to come up with logical solutions. Then there was the intuitive, inspiration-driven mind that can look at a problem and instantly see a creative solution. As it turned out, the years of spiritual work I had done to quiet that voice in my head had opened the door for almost constant inspiration. It seemed that the quieter the mind, the more that solutions became self-evident.
I remained a person whose spiritual path was surrendering to the flow of life and putting his entire heart and soul into what life was giving him to do. My twice-daily meditation sessions certainly helped to keep it all in perspective.
Chapter 37. The Industry Knocks on Our Door
For years I had been willing to let go of my personal preferences and focus on doing the absolute best I could with what life presented me. I hadn’t expected anything in return, and I was very humbled to see what was unfolding.
Chapter 38. The Template Keeps Growing
Not only were meditation and yoga essential for continuing my inward journey, but they were essential for keeping the mind sane. So much is demanded of you when you’re running an organization on which so many people rely for their livelihood. The mind needs time to quiet down and keep everything in perspective.
As I drove over to Wilbur’s, I focused on remaining open and receptive to the experience at hand so that I could see where life was taking it. As I look back now, I am so grateful that surrender had taught me to willingly participate in life’s dance with a quiet mind and an open heart.
Perhaps change only takes place when there is sufficient reason to overcome the inertia of everyday life. Challenging situations create the force needed to bring about change. The problem is that we generally use all the stirred-up energy intended to bring about change, to resist change. I was learning to sit quietly in the midst of the howling winds and wait to see what constructive action was being asked of me.
It left me breathless to see all this unfold the way it did. I was playing a game with life, and every time life made its move, a part of my noisy mind fell away. Why was I needed? Everything was unfolding on its own much better than anything I could ever imagine—let alone do.
Section 7: When Dark Clouds Become Rainbows
Chapter 39. A Touch of Magic
My nature has always been to just settle in and do my work. I wasn’t the type of person who was always looking for change. I enjoyed the repetition of a stable lifestyle and gradual, sustainable growth.
All the events that had unfolded so far in my experiment with surrender had shown me that the more I was willing to let go of the inner noise created by my personal likes and dislikes, the more I could see subtle synchronicities in what was unfolding around me. These unexpected concurrences of events were like messages from life gently nudging me in the direction she was going. I listened to these subtle nudges instead of listening to the not-so-subtle mental and emotional reactions caused by my personal preferences. This is how I practiced surrender in everyday life, and the purpose of all these stories is to share with you the perfection of the journey that unfolded.
Chapter 40. The Scary Messenger of Change
I had already learned time and again that it didn’t matter if I understood what was happening; it was sufficient to devote myself to the present moment and trust that the flow of life knew what it was doing. The flow of events that happened next was so miraculous that it had the effect of permanently freeing me from an entire layer of my personal mind. If life could pull off these events, how could I not completely surrender to her perfection?
Nonetheless, I was patiently waiting for life to make her move.
Chapter 41. The Foundation Is Built for the Future
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Chapter 42. Meanwhile—Back at the Ranch
To be there when a person is soaring high is an easy relationship. To be there during hard times requires deep friendship.
When push comes to shove, I don’t care what it takes, just free me from myself.
“For every thing there is a season, a time for every purpose under heaven.” - King Solomon
I was now all the more honored to be close to him as he passed through a period of great darkness or, better put, as a period of great darkness passed through him. He never complained, and he never got depressed or despondent. He just spent each day surrendering at a deeper and deeper level. Reality was what it was—might as well use it to let go of the personal self.
No matter who we are, life is going to put us through the changes we need to go through. The question is: Are we willing to use this force for our transformation?
Section 8: Embracing Explosive Expansion
Chapter 43. The Medical Manager Sprouts Wings
I had seen time and again that letting go not only led to amazing results, but it also left me in a state of profound inner peace. I was not in charge; life was in charge, and there was an underlying sense of enthusiasm and excitement about getting to see what was going to happen next.
Chapter 44. Medical Manager Corporation—MMGR
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Chapter 45. Becoming CEO
The constant act of letting go of one’s self-centered thoughts and emotions was all that was needed for profound personal, professional, and spiritual growth.
Chapter 46. The Internet and Health Care
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Chapter 47. Merging—But Not with the Universe
My job was to simply continue surrendering and serving what was put in front of me.
Chapter 48. Building Rome in a Day
If you let people hold you hostage, they will force you to make terrible decisions, and you will lose. You might as well take your bumps up front and at least be in control of your destiny.
Chapter 49. Hanging Out in Washington
I’m a yogi who moved out to the woods to meditate. I surrendered to the flow of life, and I end up here—unbelievable.
If I saw any weakness, fear, or anxiety come up, I just deeply relaxed back into where I was watching from. I simply kept letting go of whatever came up. This is where life had taken me, and I used all these situations as a way of letting go of myself. It was definitely working. I kept being pushed into strongly positive and negative situations, and I increasingly found myself in a very clear and undisturbed state. It seemed that the more challenges life put me through, the less my inner energy flow was affected by outer conditions. What years of willful meditation had not gotten rid of, life’s situations and challenges were rooting out of me. As long as I made getting rid of myself my only goal, every situation was a fruitful experience. If I’d had any other goal, I think the constant pressure would have been overwhelming. I found that I actually got more peaceful inside as I dealt with the ever-increasing magnitude of challenges. Life was molding me each day to become who I needed to be in order to handle tomorrow’s tasks. All I had to do was let go and not resist the process.
Section 9: Total Surrender
Chapter 50. The Raid
There was really no reason to be thinking about why this was happening or how it would turn out. Since I had absolutely no idea what was going on, thinking about it wasn’t going to help. Instead, I enjoyed spending my day letting go of whatever that voice in my head was trying to say and deeply relaxing whenever my heart began to feel anxious. In this situation, surrender was not an option; it was only sane thing to do.
When I left that evening, I sought out the lead agents. I thanked them for being so cordial and told them that I wished we could have met under better circumstances. To me, they were just people doing their jobs to the best of their ability—it certainly wasn’t their fault.
Chapter 51. Attorneys, Attorneys, and More Attorneys
I had spent all these years quieting down that mental voice, and I had learned that listening to it only fuels the fire. I knew how powerful it was to simply relax and release past that urge to defend oneself. I resolved to only discuss the matter when absolutely necessary.
I hadn’t done anything wrong, so why should I let this affect me? Over time it would work itself out. In the meantime, I was not going to let it steal the great peace and joy I felt deep inside.
Chapter 52. United States of America v. Michael A. Singer
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Chapter 53. Preparing a Defense
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Chapter 54. The Constitution and the Bill of Rights
The Sixth Amendment says, “The accused shall enjoy the right...to be informed of the nature and cause of the accusations.”
Over the next few years, it would become painfully obvious to me that only a single piece of paper stood between me and the dark abyss. That piece of paper was the U.S. Constitution.
My mantra was: This Is Reality—Deal with It.
Chapter 55. Divine Intervention
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Chapter 56. Returning to the Beginning
The legal ordeal quickly became a distant memory, almost a dream. It had come and gone, just like everything else. I could clearly see that because I had inwardly surrendered each step of the way, no scars were left on my psyche. It had been like writing on water—the impressions only lasted while the events were actually taking place. Yet in the moment of actual experience, each twist and turn had reached deep inside me and forced me past foundational fears and personal boundaries. As long as I was willing to accept the purification power of life’s flow, I kept coming out on the other side a transformed person. How could I consider this a bad experience when it created such beauty and freedom within me? To the contrary, I stand in awe of all that has happened since I started this amazing experiment of acceptance and surrender.
Unable to unbind myself from the incessant pull of my psyche, in an act of sheer desperation, I had thrown myself into the arms of life. From that point forward, all I did was my very best to serve what was put in front of me and let go of what it stirred up within me. Joy and pain, success and failure, praise and blame—they all had pulled at what was so deeply rooted within me. The more I let go, the freer I became. It was not my responsibility to find what was binding me; that was life’s job. My responsibility was to willingly let go of whatever was brought up within me.
At some point there’s no more struggle, just the deep peace that comes from surrendering to a perfection that is beyond your comprehension. Eventually, even the mind stops resisting, and the heart loses the tendency to close. The joy, excitement, and freedom are simply too beautiful to give up. Once you are ready to let go of yourself, life becomes your friend, your teacher, your secret lover. When life’s way becomes your way, all the noise stops, and there is a great peace.